Stalling

One of my last posts discussed how deadlines are scary.

There is another reason I find deadlines scary.

It not only means that you need to finish what you are working on, but also means that you need to begin working on something new.

There is part of me that is much more terrified of the something new.

I have an idea in my head for my next piece. The idea has grown a lot in the past two weeks (News stories, particularly the ones about Troy Davis and Amanda Knox, have been quite influential). I find myself thinking about it when I am editing my play, when I reading a book. So obviously the gears are going...but...I think I am afraid of moving on.

How do I know I am afraid?

Again, I haven't really worked on my writing in days. The past week due to car issues, a friend visiting, and 8.5 mile runs as a part of half marathon training has made solid writing/editing time not possible. Or at least that is what my brain would have me believe. In some ways, I believe that my play is (oh my gosh am I really going to write this?) ready to be submitted. I believe that a quick glance over by a pair of proofreading eyes will make this baby viewable to the outside world. So instead of doing that one more time and then starting the submitting process and instead of picking up the new piece and getting the ball rolling (like a few weeks ago), I have stalled.

I know I am in the very beginning stages of learning who I am as a writer. What themes I enjoy evoking, what spaces I enjoy working in, and what tricks I can use to get myself writing...I often wish I could skip ahead a few years. Hopefully then I'd know what to do to avoid these lulls or what to do to not fear them.

To compensate I have been reading works by friends, reading three books at a time, and going to lectures on astronomy and archaeology to, you know, stir things up.